Oh, Burger King!!!

Have you ever done something that you thought would be absolutely wonderful, but it left you feeling miserable? I had such an experience just within the last hour. It's name is "The Whopper" and its home is known as "Burger King."

My wife, Emily, and I don't usually eat at Burger King or other "fast food" joints. Now, we do eat out too much...but McDonald's, BK, and the like just don't make our list very often. Many know that I have a huge weakness for Taco Bell...but, with Emily's help, I've gotten better. But, I still can't say "Taco Bell" without a huge smile taking over my face.

Well, back to "The Whopper" from Burger King. I was on my way to the bank...and, in order to get to the particular branch I was going to do my business at, I had to drive by a Burger King. I saw the sign in all of its grandeur and it beckoned me. "Jason, you haven't visited us in a long time...You know you want to come and see us...You know you want a Whopper." Upon hearing the beckoning call of the Burger King, I immediately had a hankerin' (for those of you unfamiliar with this term...it means I wanted it real bad) for some totally unhealthy fast food. But, first, I went to the bank.

After finishing my banking, I had a decision to make...Do I do the right thing and bypass the Burger King and instead get lunch at a place where I had healthy options...Or do I give into the darkness within me and head to the home of the "Whopper?" (I'm not really sure why I keep putting "Whopper" in quotations...probably because I'm just so amazed by its being that I want to draw more attention to it). Well, because I, like many others, struggle to defeat the darkside, I gave in rather than putting up a fight. I'm pretty sure I had come up with some sort of justification in my mind, but after consuming my value meal, I have no clue what brought about my defeat.

So, I pulled up to the little voicebox to place my order. "I'd like a number one, with cheese, extra mayo (hey, if I'm gonna be bad, why not clog an artery while I'm at it), onion rings instead of fries (onion rings are a must...this will be apparent later), and an iced tea." I then drove up to the first window and paid the guy the $4.20 for this manly feast I was about to receive and consume. From there, it was on to the second window where the BK employee would give me my spectacular value meal. In my mind, it was as if I had been chosen to be knighted...but instead of having a sword beat on my shoulders and that whole grandiose thing, I was simply handed the holy grail...the number one with cheese, onion rings, and iced tea.

I drove home as quickly as possible...cutting through some backlots and creating my own shortcuts through places that had signs that said "employees only" and "no thru traffic." I figured I had already turned to the darkside by giving the Burger King money that would purchase food that will eventually contribute to some sort of health complication that will ultimately result in death...but not any time soon...it will just have helped. There was a level of excitement as I drove home...an anticipation of the glorious tastes that were about to explode in my mouth, treating my tastebuds to pure, unaltered ecstasy!

I entered our home and sat down at the table. I quickly pulled all of my food out of the bag and began to prepare for my feast. I made a quick trip to the fridge for some ketchup (I always need extra ketchup...for the rings and the burger). I unwrapped the monster of a sandwich and pulled the top bun off to lovingly gaze at the ingredients that had been so carefully placed on my burger...cheese, lettuce, mayo, tomato, onion, pickles...it was beautiful! So, I did what any lover of the "Whopper" and onion rings would do...I took several onion rings and placed them on top of the hamburger and then gently placed the bun back on top. Then, I squished (is that how you spell it? I smashed the thing is what I'm trying to say) so the "whopper" could fit into my mouth. Here was the moment of truth...the first bite.

I held the sandwich up to my mouth. As I began to open my mouth to insert the burger for my first bite, I swear that tears began to form in my eyes. It could have been my allergies or something like that...but, I remember thinking to myself, "Self, this is a beautiful moment! It's been a long time since you've enjoyed a 'Whopper.' This is going to be good...very good." So, I take my first bite and declared...out loud..."Dang! That's a tasty burger." I grabbed the iced tea to help wash down the first bite. Shear joy erupted in my entire being. Wow! What a burger! So, I began to alternate between bites of the sandwich and the remainder of my onion rings that didn't make the cut to be placed on the burger.

About half-way through the sandwich, I came to the realization that this was bad...very bad. But, I was at the point of no return. I had already stumbled over to the darkside...I might as well finish before I try to make my return to all that is good. So, I finished the sandwich and onion rings. And, now, as I sit here writing, I feel like crap. I want to go wash my face because it feels greasy...which is often how fast food makes me feel. I want to go make myself vomit because my stomach is so full and weighted down that I'm ridiculously uncomfortable. I want to make a vow to never go to Burger King again! I feel awful. I feel guilty for having given in to something that I knew was wrong. I feel like I need to repent or something. I wonder if the confessional is open over at St. Mary's. I'm not Catholic, but I feel like I need to confess all of this to a priest and have him give me some "Hail Mary's" or something.

And, I started thinking...this is how sin often leaves us feeling...awful, guilty, wishing there was something we could do to just make ourselves better. Sometimes we feel full of all that is bad. Sometimes we feel absolutely empty. Sometimes we come to the realization that we need Someone to come and make us better...to help us return to who we were meant to be...not the gluttonous fool we've become. I knew the ultimate result of going to Burger King, yet I chose to go through the drive thru anyway. Often, we know what the results of our sinful actions will be, yet we still find ourselves tripping up. In college, one of my friends said, "We've got to sin-it-up while we're young. We've got the rest of our lives for forgiveness." Isn't that sad? That's cheap grace...where we do the things we no better than to do, knowing that God will ultimately forgive us when we come to Him. I've got some thoughts on that...maybe I'll write more later, this is already long enough.

But, I just came to the realization as I finished my "Whopper" that maybe my life would glorify God a bit more if I'd stop and think through my actions...if I looked at every moment (yes, EVERY moment) of my life as though it was an act of worship...time with God...an act of praise. There is a better way than having it my way (hahaha, that's funny...you know because of the Burger King jingle..."have it your way!"...hahaha). The better way is having it His way. Would God not want me to eat a "Whopper?" I don't know...but I don't think He'd want me to feel as awful as I do right now just because of something I ate. God created us to live and to enjoy life...we need to remember that and stop doing stuff that makes us feel awful. No more Burger King for me...well, for now...maybe...Have you seen those Hershey's chocolate pies they have?